Healing Foreign Energies Through Intimacy: My Journey

This was incredible. Healing foreign energies within me that stemmed from intimacy with women—what an experience, and what a revelation about the blockages that were tied to it.

I woke up in the middle of the night again with little sleep. Later, I started cleaning the kitchen, but the pain within me grew stronger and stronger. Finally, I decided to take the time to address it. I had no plan for what would come, but the pain became so intense that I asked God to reveal it to me and to let everything surface, whatever it might be.

That’s when it hit me: it was connected to intimacy with women. All the women and energies that didn’t resonate with my own soul but had left a mark on mine, occupying a space within me that wasn’t truly free. These were shadow aspects, energies that held power over me and dimmed my light.

I realized these energies, awakened through intimacy, had created soul threads—connections with these women, these foreign souls. These threads formed a woven barrier, standing like a wall between my twin flame (TF) and me. That’s where the pain and blockages came from, and I understood that now was the time for healing.

I surrendered it all to God and asked Him to fill those spaces within me with His light and love, to release the foreign energies.

From here, you don’t need to keep reading, but I feel compelled to write this out and share my experience as a testimony. Writing this is also a way for me to release it.

It all started with Sigrun—I was still in school, around 18 or 19. Prior attempts at intimacy had been just that—attempts. They involved foreign energies, too, but they didn’t connect deeply with my soul. Everything I became aware of, I spoke aloud. This included countless women I couldn’t even remember by name but whose images came to mind during private moments.

I specifically named or envisioned every woman I had been intimate with. This brought about a massive transformation within me. These energies had created a significant barrier—more like a solid wall—between my TF and me. I also asked God to do the same for my TF, to heal her foreign energies as well.

What amazed me most was that, over time, I recalled more women I had forgotten about. Four more waves of memories surfaced, each revealing additional names. It’s incredible how much we can "stray" in 27 years when we’re not united with God, when we seek fulfillment outside ourselves instead of within.

These external connections are always self-sabotage—dependencies or fillers for spaces within us that aren’t already whole. This is why we call it "straying." It’s not being in alignment with our other soul half, but instead allowing foreign souls to fill the void.

This year, I’ve come to understand the divine connection God has created—that we are made as Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine, meant to strive for unity. I didn’t have this awareness before, but now I do.

Today, I forgave my old self—my younger self. With this healing, I no longer need these energies from the outside. I don’t need them to be filled by intimacy with others because I’ve asked God to fill those spaces entirely with His light.

The energetic threads that caused pain within me were numerous. I never imagined I would experience something like this during a healing journey—that I would let it flow through me and release it all.

This even included my ex-wife. Though we married in love and shared beautiful years together, I had to release this connection on an energetic level because it couldn’t stand between my TF and me. The space between us must be completely free and open.

Here’s a partial list of the women that surfaced: Kristina, Christine, Caro, Sigrun (as mentioned), Fran, Tina (not sure about the name), another woman whose name I’ve forgotten, Bunnsai, Dorina, Petra, Jadia, Mel, a model (name also forgotten), Inga, Eda, and more I recalled during the session.

It’s unbelievable how much I had forgotten, walking through life so unconsciously. There were also a few women I hadn’t been intimate with but who held energetic influence over me because I had thought of them intensely. I named them, too, and surrendered it all to God.

Now I feel much freer, especially in my upper body. I call these "energetic bindings"—threads that tied me down and created blockages. These were undoubtedly a major factor keeping me and my TF apart: foreign energies and soul threads woven into a wall between us.

I’ve mentioned before that I believe I need to reach a place where intimacy and these energies no longer have power over me before I can reunite with my TF. Today’s healing journey confirmed this for me.

The pain I experienced was immense, and the layers of blockages and foreign energies were many.

A Note on My Current Healing Journey

In the past few days, the blockages and pain have come in waves. I heal something, feel freer—even completely free—for a while. Then, more surfaces.

This pain manifests in various areas of my heart or soul, which I can now distinguish. I can even sense when a blockage arises in my TF—it feels sudden and sharp. When this happens, I connect with God and with her, doing my best to support the process.

Right now, I’m also fasting, avoiding any foreign nourishment. I’m consuming only unsweetened tea, coffee, water, and a bit of salt for electrolytes—no solid food or additives. This supports my focus on purity, clarity, and cleansing.

Even the white lilies in my room reflect this phase. A few days ago, their beautiful fragrance caught my attention in a store, and I felt compelled to bring them home.

Much love to you all,
Ray 😊